Why?

It had been storming for some time, but now it started to rain too, it just drizzled it, but then it turned into a heavy rain shower. Soon I was wet from top to bottom. What am i doing? I've been running for ages, with no destination or idea where I want to go! Why the whole thing? I dont know? I only know that her words tore me inside. They told me it would never be like it used to be. That it is too late for that, that what happened in the past cannot be made up for.
How stupid and foolish I was, I had believed we could start over, just forget what was behind us. Just start over, just try again without thinking about tomorrow, but why am I agonizing over it now, I had expected to hear something like that. But why does it hurt so much when I know it? Maybe because I believed inside that they would understand and try again to love me?Could it be? Maybe!
But that doesn't matter now, it happened and nobody can do anything about it now. Even if I wish it would sometimes.
And now? Now I'm sitting here, alone on the bridge, staring lost in thought at the rushing river below. I don't remember how long I sat here. The rain hadn't let up in that time.
After some time I suddenly got up, leaned closer to the edge to be able to see the water better for some reason. I don't know why, at least when I leaned forward at that moment I heard voices behind me, which I don't remember anymore. I turned around with a jerk, unfortunately I lost my balance due to this rapid reaction. Shortly afterwards it went black around me.
When I came to I first realized everything was blurry. When the outlines slowly began to sharpen, I slowly realized that I was in a brightly lit white room.I'm sure, but I had a premonition of where I was, so I tried to sit up, but at that moment I fell backwards again. My head turned wildly at that moment. I was not able to sit up every time I tried, everything spun around me, so I decided to lie down first, it would have put the dizziness down. In the meantime, I tried to remember what had happened, but every time I tried my head started to hurt so I stopped. Then at some point I fell asleep again. Until loud voices woke me up again.