Lilly asked softly.
"How should I not look at you?" he asked back so quietly and took her hand.
“All day you were dismissive and now.” She tried to pull her hand away from him, but he held it tight.
"Leave her there. I had to think about a lot. And that's why I was dismissive. Lilly, you know that my feelings won't change? Nancy called here this morning. She asked me what I would have done with you.You look terrible. Then you came along and Nancy was right, you looked really terrible. And you are doing that again now. "He raised a hand and lightly stroked her cheek.
"Not." She shook her head, "I just sleep badly, it has nothing to do with you or anyone else."
"Still. I had to calmly think about what I would do with you, whether from now on you are simply an acquaintance or whether I am hoping for a friendship." He smiled at her and stood up, her hand still firmly in his hand. "I'll try friendship and hope that someday you will trust me as you did before, because then you can also be honest about your feelings." He pulled her into his arms and gave her a squeeze.
"Alexander, don't. That can't work. I don't want to hurt you any more. Please don't."
"No, I won't leave you alone. But I'll give you time." He gave it another brief squeeze and then let go of it. "I love you." He said quietly and then began to clear the table."Shall I help you with the apartment now?" he asked and handed the plates to Lilly.
"You don't have to. I can do it myself."
"Ok, I ask differently. Do you need two strong arms to help you carry?"
"Sure. But I'll do the rest by myself." She looked around the kitchen. "And here, too, I'm cleaning now, by myself."
“We can do that together.” He was already starting to put the plates in the dishwasher. But then was pushed away by Lilly. “Let's go on.” She only said and he left the kitchen.
While Lilly was tidying up the kitchen, she came to rest and could think about what had just happened. She didn't like it, or rather, she liked it too much. How should she deal with it now? When he pulled her into his arms, her first feeling was that she could relax and finally regain strength, but she hadn't given in to this feeling. It doesn't help, because if you think it's all good, it breaks. She has had to experience that too often.But how should she face Alexander now? How should she behave?
I just have to get my protective shield so he can't get too close to me. So maybe a superficial friendship could develop, with this thought she finished the kitchen work and went into the living room where Alexander was sitting in front of the television. “Do you want to watch me TV?” He asked, patting the sofa next to him.
“No, I still have to work.” She smiled, but realized that it wasn't the superficial smile, so she immediately stopped smiling.
"Then I don't want to stop you." He smiled at her and Lilly went into her room to write her new novel.
When Lilly entered the room, the first thing that caught her eye was a picture. It hung over her bed and looked lonely in the otherwise bare room. It was the picture of Alexander, the heart. He had found a framework for it and found the perfect place. Lilly slowly sank down on the bed.Her gaze fell on the pebbles that she had already packed together and that were now in front of the cupboard. Determined to make the room more comfortable and started unpacking the boxes.
After about an hour she had made it, had put away the closet, as well as the desk, when Alex knocked on the door.
“Yes?” She turned and saw him in the doorway with a cup in his hand from which steam was rising.
"I thought you could use a cup of tea," he smiled, "but I thought you were working too." He went to the desk and put the cup down.
“Thank you, also for the picture.” She sat down on the bed.
"You wanted it, didn't you?" he too sat down. "Yes that's true."
"When do you want to leave tomorrow?"
"I thought about one o'clock. You can come later then."
“Yes I can.” He got up and went to the door. "The room suits you and the picture gives an interesting contrast to the rest."
"Right. I think it's great." She smiled.
"Good night my angel."
“Good night.” Lilly said as the door closed.
Lilly decided to sit down at the new book and went to her desk, where she started up her laptop. She started to work.
She had just started the book and it was going to be completely different from her first two books. Lilly pondered and thought of her second book. She hadn't told anyone that it existed, only the publisher who bought it knew about it. Their condition was that it was kept secret until the last minute that it existed and when it came out. But of course that hadn't worked, something had leaked and the rumor got around. Lilly wondered why Nancy hadn't spoken to her about it or anyone else.
The book was due out in a month, and by then she wanted the guidelines for her third book ready.
This time it's not about Nanja's loved ones, like in the first two books.The main character should have a completely different character, thought Lilly and absently reached for the cup Alexander had brought her while she was making notes.
The next day, Lilly woke up early and felt sleepy. She had the nightmares again that welled her from time to time. She got up and went into the gang room. When she passed Alexander's room she heard the soft snoring and she had to smile.
She quickly got ready and then realized that it was only half past seven when she entered the kitchen to make breakfast. Then she wrote a slip of paper and put it and a key next to the food and went to her apartment.
She had already packed all her things and was now cleaning the apartment when there was a knock on the door. She didn't notice this, however, because she had music in her ears - it was way too loud. She also overheard the storm bell and also overheard the front door opening and a person approaching her.so and here I end first, would be very happy about clerks
HEAL Inken