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Here we are ...
We both...
You and me...
The others around us ...
But I ignore them.
My eyes are only on you.
On your apparently sleeping face.
But you are not sleeping, I know that.
And suddenly all I feel is pain ...

How did it actually come about?
Why did it come to this?
Why could we never get closer?
What would have happened if things had turned out differently?
If you had never flown down to earth

I should have told you by then what I wanted to tell you for so long.
My feelings...
My thoughts...
Everything...
But I couldn't.
I just watched you say goodbye.
How you flew down to earth with the others.
I just let it happen!
Allowed You To Fly To Your Own Doom!

I hate myself for that.
I blame myself for it every day.
God...
If there was one wish he could grant for me, I would know which one.
I would turn back time.
At the time when everything was still okay.
But he cannot fulfill my wish.
Instead, he watched it happen.
What happened on earth ...
And then you should die for it!

I can not understand!
I can't understand this person who did this to you!
I can't understand God's decision either!
And I can't understand why you stayed with Satan!
In which...
Did you have a choice?
No!
Of course you wanted to live!
That's why you joined him.
Allowed you to become a servant of evil.

And why?
Just to see me!
Just to tell me your true feelings!
And that's exactly what hurts so much.
You did all of this just for me ...
And it is just me who couldn't help you ...

I can't help you now either.I only see your motionless face.
Hold your cold hand
See the wounds of Satan's attack.
And immediately I know ...
I lost.

I lost to our love
I lost to Satan.
I lost to everyone.
And especially I lost to myself!
But it can't be!
It can't be!
That can't be the end!
No not like this!
Not until we meet again ...

And we'll meet again.
Most certainly.
I believe in that.
The pain slowly disappears, giving way to hope.
Yes, we will surely meet again.
In another world, in another time ...
Somewhere.
So I give you my earring on your journey into the hereafter.
A journey that I too will soon embark on.
And always with the knowledge that one day we will meet again ...

My dearest Finn!

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